Pictured above, indicating the type of penises they wished they had, are brothers Tom and Rick Smith, founders of Taser International.
At their 2009 conference, they dressed up in gay outfits to hawk their increasingly popular products. Witness the limp-dicked flag-worship fully on display.
At the end of their Keynote Address, they launched into an uplifting sermon about how their company should be “celebrated” for “swimming against the tide of history” by providing weapons intended to “preserve life”.
Meanwhile, between 2001 and August 2008, these “life preserving” weapons were used to kill 334 people, most of whom were unarmed.
Or the cop who tasered a girl, no lie, in the brain, because he couldn’t chase her down on foot? Or the one that shoved a taser up a man’s ass in Idaho? Or those who tasered and pepper-sprayed an umbrella-wielding man in a Dollar Store bathroom, and after finding out that he was both mentally disabled and deaf still decided to charge him with resisting arrest, failure to obey a police officer and (of course) disorderly conduct, charges which the on-duty magistrate refused to accept? And don’t forget the belligerent baseball fan, the 72-year old grandmother, the bride and groom tasered at their wedding, the bicyclists who were tased after cops tried to run them off the road. And what about that guy who burst into flames? What about the six-year-old who was tasered after threatening to cut his own leg with a glass? (That’ll teach him!)
UPDATE 08/26/09: On second thought, to call these guys ‘gay’ is to flatter them. But I still suspect that they are limp dicked.